"riverrun, past Eve and Adam's, from swerve of shore to bend of bay, brings us by a commodius vicus of recirculation back to Howth Castle and Environs" From what Martin Amis has described as the "reader-nuking" Finnegan's Wake.
I made it to the third paragraph - "bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonner ronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoordenenthurnuk!"
Ther sister site to the Bulwer-Lytton site is the Sticks and Stones site, which presents real examples of bad published writing for our enjoyment. As an example of a gripping opening sentence, try this, by PD James:
For a temporary shorthand-typist to be present at the discovery of a corpse on the first day of a new assignment, if not unique, is sufficiently rare to prevent its being regarded as an occupational hazard.
"In considering the use of grammar as a corrective of what are called ‘ungrammatical’ expressions, it must be borne in mind that the rules of grammar have no value except as statements of facts: whatever is in general use in a language is for that very reason grammatically correct."
[Henry Sweet, 1891.]